Archive for October 2012

Eleven years of Ben

Sunday, October 28, 2012

I remember once sitting in my moms' prayer group when one of my friends said: "Aww, c'mon admit it: the baby is always our favorite." She was dead serious.  Her youngest child is the one she is the most compatible with but it's part of the mom code that none of us ever utter the word "favorite."  That's reserved for the children when they are fighting with each other or trying to manipulate their parents with guilt and shame.  ("He's your favorite."  "I always knew she was your favorite.")

As kids we always remember using those phrases but they took on a different meaning when I became a parent. I think I can speak for most mothers when I say that we love all our children equally but we have a different relationship and a separate affinity with each individual child.  Being the middle child, I always thought my mom favored my younger sister because she gave in to her more often and the rules my parents were such sticklers about seemed to turn lax by the time the youngest was a teenager.  I now fully understand that you're just too tired by the third time around the mountain.  And you do react to situations differently because you know this child is your last.  You want to savor and hold onto every last moment of parenting. I have definitely experienced this firsthand with Ben.

To his brothers, Ben has the most coveted position in the family.  To Ben, it's the worst.  Being the youngest of three boys means being picked on, teased and tortured while watching your competitive siblings experience every rite of passage as you wait on the sidelines for your turn.  When your turn finally comes, it feels like forever has passed and your brothers respond with a "been there, done that."  What Ben probably won't realize until he's a father is that,  in addition to the above, he'll also get more patient, mature and easy going parents.  He'll have three years of being the only child with more resources to go around.  After watching his big brothers make their mistakes, he'll have the benefit of learning from his observations causing himself and his parents less heartache.  I'd say he won the lottery in the birth order gamble even though there may not be as many pictures of him in the scrapbook.

Aside from all the "favorite" talk, Ben is a pretty special guy and I'm so glad we get to celebrate 11 years of him being in our family.  He is conscientious, considerate, affectionate and kind.  I truly can't imagine life without his sweet disposition and giving heart.

You are a blessing to so many, Benjamin Davis and on October 28th you are definitely everyone's favorite birthday boy!  Especially mine.  P.S.: Don't tell your brothers.


It's a cowgirl thing

Sunday, October 21, 2012

When October rolls around, inevitably the questions come: "What do you want for your birthday?"  "What do you want to do for your birthday?"  I hate being fussed over, I know how busy everyone is with their own lives and I never want to add one more chore to their to-do lists.  Not that celebrating a friend's birthday is a chore but you know what I mean.

This year I thought I'd beat everyone to the punch and host my own birthday gathering.  In this season of life, time, energy and resources seem to be in short supply.  It feels like during the chance meetings in the grocery store, on the field or at the school the conversation always ends with: "we should get together."  And then it never happens.  Next thing you know, another year has passed by.  So what better excuse to connect than a birthday?

I sat at the computer with the Evite site in front of me and made a list of the women in my life who make me laugh the most.  I love serious, deep conversation but my absolute favorite thing to do is laugh out loud.  This is what I wanted for my 45th birthday.  And with the craziness of fall, I knew this was just what we all needed on a stormy Saturday night.  I asked for no gifts, no one to bring food or drink but just to come with a funny card and their delightful selves and let ME celebrate THEM.  Seven out of nine ladies braved the elements and even my BFF from college drove two hours to be here--and brought her husband to play with Trey.

We had the best time eating, drinking and, of course, LAUGHING.  I  looked around the house at one point and saw many different spontaneous conversations happening and felt so grateful for the gift of these women and their faithful friendship to me. Being the good friends that they are, they indulged me in leaving their comfort zone to play a board game (another one of my loves)  full of semi-personal questions.  Knowing they could refuse to answer any question, we donned our bandanas, saddled up and spent the next 2 hours playing "Cowgirls Ride the Trail of Truth."  Everyone was a good sport and many times we had to regroup after ending up in tears of laughter.

This definitely lands on my Top Ten of the last 45 birthdays.

The Cowgirl Rules

Janelle, Lacey & Laurie

Brenda had us all in stitches

Bring on 45! Giddy up!

Maria and Ann are a dangerous duo.

Jennie stole the camera for some self portraits--these two are so photogenic

From left to right everyone is seated by the length of our friendship.  2 years on the left and 23 years on the right.


Homecoming: The Dance

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Now, you really must think I am living vicariously through my children with yet another post about Homecoming.  But I couldn't end without sharing the best pictures of all.  I love these young couples.  They were so sophisticated and mature that evening and patient with me as I snapped what was probably the 50th photo of them.  They had already met at one of the girlls' houses for pictures but we showed up at the restaurant as they arrived and coaxed them into one more. I am particularly crazy about the last couple on the right. 


Homecoming: Round Two

Friday, October 19, 2012

Since we had so many family members in town for the big occasion, the occasion was begging for a tailgate party.  It was a perfect fall evening and we had a blast--and finally put that portable grill that we "just had to have" to use.  What a fun crowd!

Trey is grilling up the brats and hotdogs--Devin likes to supervise.
Lori & Makenna
Auntie Care and Brenda hit it off.
My mom and her BFF
Parker gives our tailgate party a Thumbs Up!
Our good friend Steve stopped by for some fun.
Parker personalized his finger for his cousin.
Mimi & Papa Jim's first high school football game.  
We won!!

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Royalty Runs in the Family

Thursday, October 18, 2012

What a month it has been!  When I logged on and saw that it has been almost 30 days since my last post, it really hit home that my life has not been my own.  Instead of trying to fit in all the happenings of the last few weeks, I thought I'd spread it out and hit the highlights one post at a time--and start with my favorite.

As with many circumstances when you have a high school boy, you find out what is going on via 
Facebook.  They pick and choose what to tell you and as of late.....the lips have been sealed more often than they are moving.  Thank goodness for my mom friends who have girls that still dish when they come home from school.  This was how I found out my son had been nominated as a sophomore class prince for the Homecoming royalty.  When I asked him about it, he said: "I didn't think you'd care."  What?  "Of course I care son.  Did you know that me and your Auntie Lori were both Homecoming princesses our senior year?"  Him: "Oh yeah, I kind of remember hearing about that."  Lest you think I peaked in high school, let me assure you this was exciting but not my five minutes of fame.  It was a special time and a huge honor but unfortunately it was marred by jealous classmates who thought I didn't deserve the nomination much less the vote and spread the news.  Oh, high school.  What was really special though was that my sister was a princess the following year and I got to come back from college for the day to "hand down my crown."  My mom and grandma were there to witness the occasion and you'd think we were at Westminster Abbey.  

It's funny how some things come back full circle.  Since I don't have a daughter, I figured I'd miss out on all those events because those things just don't matter to boys in the same way.  But the school does such a good job of making it special and really honoring those students who are nominated and voted to represent their class.  The cutest part was that Quinn won and his grandparents, aunt and cousin were all on hand to watch history repeat itself.  He brushed it off as no big deal but I love what my mentor said when she heard the news:  "That says so much about how highly Quinn is thought of by his classmates and how you and Trey have raised him.  What an honor. I rejoice with you!" I hadn't thought of it this way--nor am I looking for parenting accolades because we have done plenty wrong--but her words completely warmed my heart.  And so did my prince. 

 1987--handing down the crown to my little sis.

 Senior Homecoming assembly

 Grandma and her royal grandson

The former princesses and the current prince.  We look a little different.